Woody Allen humor

“My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.”
 “I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.”
“God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.”
“Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.”
“If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.”
 “You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.”
“I hate reality but it's still the best place to get a good steak.”